I did not list any contact details for you because I do not actually want to hear from you. If this fact upsets you, please seek emotional assistance from a trusted family member, friend, therapist, etc. to help you cope. Like most reasonable people, I do not enjoy others carelessly wasting my time, nor do I tolerate harassment or abuse from anyone. Here are some true-life examples of what not to do to me:-
- Do not try to sell me something.
- If I want a product or a service, I will find out about it and buy it on my own initiative, without any interference from you. This policy is not negotiable. Please take your sales skills and exert them elsewhere. Thanks.
- Do not expect custom tutoring on demand.
- I already have a full time job that keeps me extremely busy and pays me better than most Canadians. Accordingly, I do not offer private tutoring for strangers, free or paid, online or in person, about physics or gender or any other subject. If I offer to tutor a friend or acquaintance, I charge $0.
- Every busy professional has a triage/queueing system for requests that should be respected. Parents should refrain from encouraging their children to write to academics expecting custom help on demand unless they first help them understand that the answer could be
no. One set of parents threw extended tantrums after I declined their child's request: the mother sent torrents of abuse, and the father reported me to my Department Chair and to the Provost (a university's chief academic officer). Kindly avoid emitting a stink of entitlement this strong.
- Do not try to be my academic groupie.
- I am not interested in having any groupies. Generally, I welcome appropriate chats with students (current or former), and find it rewarding when strangers like my outreach communication efforts, but I do not desire to have fans per se.
- One member of the general public attended every class, seminar, and outreach talk I gave locally, for months turning into years, and asked intellectually inappropriate questions in almost all of them. They eventually became so cumulatively disruptive and stalkerish that they are now banned from the UofT Physics building.
- Another member of the general public determinedly harassed me by telephone for several years with waves of rambling incoherence and bizarre requests, eventually forcing me to disconnect my voicemail. Subsequently, they escalated their harassment into a physical assault in my office and a death threat. They are still banned from entering the building, despite repeated attempts to lift the ban.
- Do not stalk me.
- Some dude in the USA stalked me online and harassed me for over four years on twitter, starting circa 2009. His pattern was to take potshots from hundreds of sockpuppet accounts, couched as grandiose criticisms of my perceived behaviour. He also tried to gaslight supportive social media friends. Later on, in December 2015, he restarted his abuse by email. The most charitable interpretation I can muster overall is that he felt inadequate in a competition existing only in his own mind and needed nontrivial help.
- Some dude in Germany stalked me online after seeing a livestreamed public lecture I gave at the Perimeter Institute, and in April 2016 he sent a long and extremely intrusive
fan email to my university account. In it, he tried to inject himself into my personal life without my consent and declared a sexual fetish for my gender identity. He apparently lives under the misapprehension that I and others he obsesses about online exist for his consumption and enjoyment. Ewww, dude -- get a better hobby!
- Do not send me transphobic nastygrams.
- After I spoke up publically in 2016 against brazen public transphobia from another UofT professor, members of his Lobster Cult harassed me intensely and for prolonged periods on the basis of my gender identity and gender expression, using every electronic and telephone communication channel they could find. This kind of harassment is a violation of the Ontario Human Rights Code.
- Do not try to get me fired for my personal political beliefs.
- Angry conservative reactionaries have tried more than once to get me fired from my tenured faculty job for expressing progressive/leftist political opinions on my personal twitter feed. They fail to understand that my employer has zero interest in -- or legal basis for -- regulating what tenured professors say on our personal social media feeds. For proof, just look at how they handled the Lobster Cult Leader himself.